DADDY I MISS YOU

A tribute to daddy, my father, who passed away when I was at the verge of turning six, a very young age for both of us. We missed so many opportunities together, first communion, engagement, wedding, and his grand-children so many wonderful experiences that we could have shared.

As an infant I was raised by my maternal grandmother and came to live with daddy only at the ripe old age of 2 and a half. A brat of the first order, thoroughly spoilt by the grandparents and an assortment of aunts and uncles, they say my feet never touched the ground and all I had to do was point and what I wanted would come to me. Daddy had a wild one to deal with, at 2 and a half I could speak much more clearly than my sister who is a year older to me. I, apparently smart-mouthed him at every possible opportunity.

My memory of him is hazy at best. A blurred image of a man sitting on a sofa, him switching on the television or something similar, morning wake up calls “Nisy, Nancy”. Both of us apparently woke up at a single call and even made our own beds. My uncles and aunts say he was a wonderful brother. His opinions respected and listened to and he was considered as the go to person for anything and everything.

My mother in those times after he passed away, did the best possible for us, tuitions, dance classes, sports coaching, she gave us all of it. Yet at some odd moments I wonder how different our lives would have been, not just mine and my sister’s but mummy’s too if he had been around. Often at programs me or my sister would wish both daddy and mummy could watch us perform. He loved to see us perform, enrolled us for dance classes at a very early age, me at 3 and my sister 4. He would have been a proud father watching his children performing on stage or at sporting events.

I am often asked, do you remember him, I don’t, not really. But I do know whenever life has thrown boomerangs at me, I go and have a quiet conversation with him, and I feel better. Almost as if he is there with his arms around me saying its ok, I am here. Do I know him? I wish I did. I wish I had a chance to grow up with him do all those things little girls did with their daddies. I wish my mom had a chance to grow old with him. I am sure my sister wishes the same.

I hope we, me and my sister have done him proud. We have tried to fill the gap for our mother once we were old enough just as she did for us when we were children. I wish he was here with us, no, I know he is here with us, watching over us, taking care of us.  I don’t know if I have said it during the very brief time that I had with you, but daddy please know, I love you!